The Blizzard at Night.

It's 2:30 am, but I just had to write about this:

I'm amazed at how much a snowstorm at night looks like a sandstorm at day. The lights reflect off the white uniform landscape and all the illumination makes the streets look like a blanched desert. The moonlight travels down and bounces back up into the sky, giving the clouded firmament a glowing red tint like some dusty high noon darkened by the particles blowing in the air. And while I'm sad I can't get my camera to get a clear picture of it, I'm pleased to know that there are still some things that only the eye can capture.

Formspring.

Do you have any major phobias?

I had to give this one some extra thought. I must say I have a lot of mild fears, because of my tendencies to make things awkward and/or embarrass myself and/or miss something that is obvious to everyone else. But a major phobia? I think for everyone it's the same: that is, I imagine your biggest fear would be to lose your biggest joy.

For example: if my biggest joy is my looks, then my biggest fear would be to grow old. If my biggest joy is being liked by others, then my biggest fear would be to be alone. If my biggest joy is wasting time, then my biggest fear would be to run out of it. And if my biggest joy is living life, then my biggest fear would be to die.

So what's my biggest joy? My biggest joy is the assurance of salvation by grace through faith in Jesus Christ. And that, my friend, I cannot lose. So...no. :)

"The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life;of whom shall I be afraid?" - Psalm 27:1

Ask me anything

Formspring.

whats the weirdest thing you've done to your skin?

so i had pretty bad eczema (dry skin) throughout my entire childhood & adolescence. being filipino and thus the son of a nurse, i got the hook up for every kind of known medication, moisturizer, oil, cream, and educated suggestion. i tried everything from homegrown aloe vera to sensual oils to lanolin, used for nursing mothers to heal chapped nipples.

but this ones the kicker: the cashier at the discount bread store we frequented as a family told us of some blue horse cream that worked for her son. we went to the local/only known rodeo shop and picked it up, right next to the feeding buckets. it's color was not found in nature and it had the consistency of almond jello. it didn't work, and made me break out so bad the next morning i could hardly move.

much thanks to lauren marks and the makers of elocon for my now steady solution. let me know if you're looking for infomercial testimonials.

Ask me anything

Audition #9.

"It's not raining, boy."

The moment I started walking down the sidewalk amidst clear weather with an umbrella over my head, I knew I would be writing about it later. The neighborhood is relatively quiet, but I wasn't surprised to have someone call me out on my ridiculousness. I did it because I saw the branches violently rustling outside my window, and I didn't want to mess up my hair.

Sigh…let me explain...

It starts with me waking up for about the third time, noticing on my phone that it's two hours past my goal time for rising and shining. An easy shuffle to the shower and back. Once more I look at my phone to find a missed call & voicemail from my manager -- she says can't chat with me this morning as I previously requested, but "that's okay just do well on your audition today."

…my what?

I go to my inbox to find the day-old e-mail and immediately prepare for the audition I have to be at in less than 3 hours (including the 30 min train ride to Manhattan). Oh yes, and I have to call work and let them know of this spontaneous conflict. This is what an actor hoping to work has to be prepared for. I was told yesterday that you've got to want the job like any of these Winter Olympians want the gold, no excuses. Without hesitation I pick the outfit, print out the sides (audition script), and grab my folder fully stocked with headshot & resume trimmed to 8x10 standards. I rummage through clips of the show I'm auditioning for, practice a "slight Chinese accent," and get some intel on the casting directors to stock the small talk with relevant ammo. The longer you can keep them engaged with you, the better (note: does not apply to fiancees).

Of all the things I'm prepared to bring, I'm prepared to bring myself. The more I've been learning about the business the more I've learned that ultimately you have to bring yourself because that's what you're marketing, and intuitively the last thing an actor thinks to bring to his performance is himself. Thankfully, I am not the auditioning actor I was in September. Whew, God is good.

Oh yeah, and the umbrella. Hey, you do what you think will help you look your best for the audition, right? I don't mind looking like my mom evading the sun's rays if it will help me look my best. As it turns out, it doesn't. I can't figure out where the air is blowing from and it just…doesn't help.

Winter breeze shan't cool my fire!
I shall press on thitherto
as though I were the bravest of souls
immortalized on Halls advertisements!

How does it go? Well, I don't hesitate in saying it's by far my best audition yet. One quick, confident, take and some enlivened conversation afterward and I'm out the door. All the training, centering, disciplining, is really paying off. And leave it to none other than God to make the audition location three blocks from work. I finish my audition at 12:15 and by 12:20 I'm in uniform behind the register like a real New Yorker. Well, like a real working actor.

The Great Big Catch-Up: A Visual Guide.

Uh, sorry buddy, wrong blog post...

In atoning for my chronicling negligence, or chronicleligence, here's what you missed since since my trip to California over Christmas:


One of my best and oldest friends got married to a wonderful woman. I love them and wish the new Mr. & Mrs. Jan Ormeo a happy God-centered marriage of love and improvement. I spent the following Christmas week with more friends & family:
with paljean/jeanniepal/jewels
some buddies from high school


more old 'nuts...we failed to take a group one (ahem Chrysanthy)

Leong Five.the beloved CFBC, including one very special girl...sorry, Melron, I'll get to you in a second.

Christmas Day topped them all. The same lovable foursome, plus some of the greater Leong dynasty.
This would be the first time we had gotten all together in over a decade. Last time I saw my niece Sam she was having her 2nd birthday, and that night I spoke to a high school upper classman who looked a whole lot like her. I was pleased to see the sociable young woman she has now become. We all got back into the Leong family groove pretty quickly...


niece Dana
uncle Juanito
cousin Tony and Mom picking their next 100-pointer
I spoke the nature of hope and what it has to do with Christmas. I actually gave this message a number of times throughout the second and last week of my stay. This was the gift I wanted to give to my friends and family this year, and although material presents aren't scrapped for the future, I'm learning much more what God has built me to offer. I believe that lesson about myself was God's gift to me this year. And He sure knows how to give them -- I mean, I'm still beaming over the one He gave over 2,000 years ago.

The next day was a very close runner up to highlight of my week. I spent the day with Melron, and that night we attended her family's Christmas party featuring a wig theme. [Insert clever pun here] It was wiggity wiggity wacky.

the sibs and the sig figs.

1/10000th of Melron's Farol family, masters of disguise.

Afterwards I left for "home," being seen off by some gracious friends and some thought/heart-provoking conversation...

...not to mention stowing away some precious cargo.

got to vlog with the guff....this one's a must-see
even making a trip/sub-trip to DC to visit one Irene "Ica" Diongzon

Melron and I got there in time to enjoy residual Christmastime in the city, and ring in the new year right. We skipped the countdown crowd, but that didn't stop us from counting down...


fast forward through a couple weeks of re-gearing, per my resolutions, and here I am:
without pockets and more Chinese than ever (I enjoy the white backdrop...makes me look less pale). More on the current events in the next post!

Happy 23rd Birthday, Melron.

"A woman's heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek Him just to find her." — Max Lucado

What The New Year Brought.

Resolutions, resolutions, resolutions. A tradition that tends to lose its significance as we get older and think less of it -- but ah so is it for all traditions, isn't it. Like Christmas, Thanksgiving, and Easter, I'm determined to approach this one with intention and endurance. So what did I resolve to do?
Consistency is my theme for 2010, written in brown and light green marker on scratch paper, masking taped to my wall (I'm also trying to spend less money so I worked with what I had). I've been told my behavior is erratic, and I don't doubt it. For years I used to take subtle pride in the fact that I was committed to so many things, that I had to be here, there, and yonder all at the same time. I realized a few years ago that this wasn't because I was overcommitted, it was because I was under-committed. There was something in me that avoided commitment and did so by "needing" to be somewhere else. I tried to be everywhere, but was too often nowhere to be found. Looking back I really regret the relationships I've hurt because of my poor character, which now fuels my desire for change. So where does that begin?

"pray without ceasing...for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you" (1 Thess 5:17)

Before any others, my relationship with God is the first to suffer from my inconsistency. What the author is saying here is that prayer is how we spend time with God, and that it needs to be regular and consistent. Praying without ceasing suggests a mental attitude of prayerfulness, continual personal fellowship with God, and consciousness of being in his presence throughout each day. But that's only half of the conversation.

"So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ" (Rom 10:17)

The natural companion. God speaks to us in a lot of ways; through nature, through events, through people, but He speaks to us chiefly through the Bible. This, along with church and accountability, are essential to building consistent relationship with God. If you used to read it, start again. If you never have, can I ask why? If you have issues with it, let's talk it out -- I have a feeling I can help. Message me if you want to know more.

These are two of a number of habits I've decided to build this year. I put up a list of some habits to maintain (daily, weekly, monthly) and goals to achieve (1 month, 3 months, 6 months) right up on my wall where I have to look at them every day. If it works for Michael Phelps, I'm sure it couldn't hurt. The plan is to start small and build my way up; I still have a list of potential habits and goals that I'm not putting up until I know I can handle the ones currently active. It's been effective so far; there's a significant decrease in anxiety when you're no longer putting things off.

Not pictured is the one habit I haven't managed to lasso: blog regularly. I could come up with a million excuses for why I've kept so many juicy stories away from this blog, but the real reason is simply a lack of discipline, that somber old tune. I want to change that starting now, and I hope you'll join me.